Can I become a leader in OCD research or treatment...maybe..maybe not....

So the time has come; I have mustered up enough strength to push through the OCD barrage of worst case scenarios, doubt, questions, bullying and have enrolled to take some classes at the local college to begin my quest to help others with OCD to the best of my abilities.

My ultimate goal would be to become medically trained with a concentration in natural medicine.  That is not to say I do not believe that current conventional medications don’t work for OCD, such as SSRI’s.  (Because they clearly help me) And more and more people are coming to understand the importance of good CBT (Cognitive Behavior Therapy), specifically ERP (Exposure Response Therapy) However, I feel there is a huge gap to be filled by more natural approaches to help our bodies and minds function better which will in turn help our OCD.  My own journey has been helped by listening to simple advice of how to feed my body with good nutrition and some specific supplements.  And help is needed from all angles to increase awareness and to decrease the suffering of OCD.

Good things did come from the horrible storm of my last OCD crisis.  I decided I would take charge of my treatment to the best of my ability, I would really try to help myself.  I searched for a well-trained therapist, read tons of books on OCD and its treatment, practiced ERP, and learned to step away from my internal processes and look at the big picture.  Each and every one of these things was huge for me to do because while they were all necessary they all had “bad things” surrounding them….obsessions.  For example, reading books on OCD. What if…I read about another persons obsessions and they made sense to me so they now became mine too.  Basically I would introduce a “bad thought” into my mind and I would be responsible for making myself worse with more “bad thoughts” because I decided to read a book about OCD.  Not only would it be my fault that I would have another “bad thought” to deal with but it would never go away…it would be in the ginormous filing cabinet in my mind of never-ending thought records that play again and again and again.

Anyway….Back to the point, GOOD THINGS. I learned to face some of my fears and by facing them I have uncovered new paths to travel.  I have read and heard so many others stories and it has really moved me to realize, I am not alone.  There are many people faced with the ugly feeling of your own mind turning against you and I want to help.

It breaks my heart to realize how many people have to live with OCD before getting a proper diagnosis and then when they do get a diagnosis they end up not receiving the correct help.  And then to think of all the parents that are dumb-struck when they see these behaviors because of PANS (Pediatric Autoimmune Neuropsychiatric Syndrome).  To get a diagnosis is incredibly hard and then when they do receive a diagnosis finding someone to give treatment in the correct manner is almost non-existent.  There is so much to be learned about OCD and PANS and its implications it is mind-boggling.  More work is needed!!

So I have decided I want to help and I am going to “choose” to move forward  with pursuing a career in the health field even though I am incredibly fearful.  (I will have to write another post about all the stuff I went through to get to this “choice”)  I have enrolled in my first two classes, Anatomy and Physiology; and a Math Course.  I only enrolled in two for many reasons…1) Money 2) ChildCare (which could probably be solved with more of number one…haha) 3) I am moving forward BUT still fearful….I’m not cured and able to throw all caution to the wind..lol

Will I be able to accomplish all of the great intentions of my mind and become a leader in OCD research or treatment?  The only answer to I know to be 100% certain is….maybe….maybe not….

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